Missing
Action
Yes people, I've been missing in action. MIA in it's acronym form. I've mysteriously disappeared and almost no one had contact with me for the last few days. I like to do this as a social experiment on occassion. It tests whether what kind of friends you make. If you made pro-active friends, then chances are someone would automatically call you when you slip under the radar. But of course since I went MIA, means the friends I keep are the more passive type.
Passive vs Active
There is no clear cut winner of this comparison. It's actually more to our individual tastes. I for one am an introverted extrovert. What does that mean??? It means I'm a shy socialite, a person who take time to warm up to people. But when I do, people feel that I can get pretty social and go out pretty often with them. Normally it takes anywhere between 6 months to a year before I feel comfortable enough to behave like an extrovert with a new friend.
Personality Problem?
Yeah, sometimes I wonder what the heck's wrong with me. When people first know me, I'm like so weird, shy and so abstract from the world. Then when you know me long enough, POW! I change into another person and I become like any other friend who does the normal things a friend does. Perhaps it's because of my apprehension of making the undesirable friends. I've had some nasty experiences before, I had a major change in personality after that. I guess this is just the way to filter the unworthy from the worthy.
Worthy Friends
Friends whom I find worthy, are usually showered with attention and help when they need it. Unworthy friends are usually ignored, ostracized and generally we barely even communicate. Friends are supposed to hang with you through thick and thin right? Well, it all depends on how thick and how thin are you and your friends willing to endure together. But hey, true friends are gems in the rough. You won't know who your real friends are until the situation calls for it.
People
We should all go out to meet new friends. At least that's why one of my friends is telling me. I used to be all excited about meeting new people and making friends with them. But after a bad experience of being abused and misused, the toad was bitten and now he's shy. It's still easy to go out and meet new people, it's still easy to strike up a conversation. But it's no longer easy to trust a stranger and even harder to let them become my friend. Hurt done by a friend runs deeper than I thought it would. There's nothing more painful than being hurt by a friend whom you trust alot.
Getting Over It
It's easy to say, "Get over it!" But it's never easy to do. I mean, time sure does heal all wounds. However, there are some wounds that time only heals halfway. I don't know if I'd ever go back to the person I once was, that was a person who loved socializing, had no problems expanding his social circle, was willing to try new relationships. Right now, I'm more of a train wreck that can't do any of the above. I've been like that since I entered NS. It's sometimes quite painful to see myself like this, I know I've got to change soon or I think I'm in danger of becoming a bitter, angsty and vengeful person. I guess I'm off to change myself now. Alauz Out.
Idiots of today, Geniuses of tomorrow
Friday, September 08, 2006
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Steve Irwin
Determination
I have a confession to make. I partially admire dedicated people. I admire the fact that despite the odds stacked against the person. The person continues to do what they do unphased. Steve Irwin was one such person. When he was alive, he constantly confounded people by remaining forever ethusiastic, passionate and sincere in the message he tried to bring across. Despite the fact that he drives me up the wall, he kind of inspires me. If I had one tenth of his determination, I will be much, much more than I am today.
Greatness
Instead of this crappy blog, I might already been a writer for the news who is more controversial than Mr. Brown. Maybe I might even be tortured by the ISA years ago. Who knows, with the sheer amount of determination and spirit, I could have made an impact so large. Maybe large enough to put Singapore recognized by more people around the world. Hopefully in a positive manner rather than negative.
Respect
I respect Steve, I really have to say that if I never watched his programs before, I might never have had the awareness of the need to conserve animals here on earth. He sent out a strong message that animals aren't things without feelings, animals are things that sometimes are more human than we are. And if we don't do our part to stop poaching, hunting them or destroying their environment. Then we wouldn't see them around anymore. It's his message that touched each and everyone of us that used to watch his shows.
Eulogy
On this day a good man fell in service of mother nature. He had fought bravely against the cynical human nature of people and gave morality to people who had none. Despite the people who laughed at him, I who have laughed loudest, have the utmost respect for him in death. To be able to affect the world like he did, he is indeed a great man. May your legacy be remembered fondly by all whom you have taught the value of conservation. Alauz Out.
Idiots of today, Geniuses of tomorrow
Determination
I have a confession to make. I partially admire dedicated people. I admire the fact that despite the odds stacked against the person. The person continues to do what they do unphased. Steve Irwin was one such person. When he was alive, he constantly confounded people by remaining forever ethusiastic, passionate and sincere in the message he tried to bring across. Despite the fact that he drives me up the wall, he kind of inspires me. If I had one tenth of his determination, I will be much, much more than I am today.
Greatness
Instead of this crappy blog, I might already been a writer for the news who is more controversial than Mr. Brown. Maybe I might even be tortured by the ISA years ago. Who knows, with the sheer amount of determination and spirit, I could have made an impact so large. Maybe large enough to put Singapore recognized by more people around the world. Hopefully in a positive manner rather than negative.
Respect
I respect Steve, I really have to say that if I never watched his programs before, I might never have had the awareness of the need to conserve animals here on earth. He sent out a strong message that animals aren't things without feelings, animals are things that sometimes are more human than we are. And if we don't do our part to stop poaching, hunting them or destroying their environment. Then we wouldn't see them around anymore. It's his message that touched each and everyone of us that used to watch his shows.
Eulogy
On this day a good man fell in service of mother nature. He had fought bravely against the cynical human nature of people and gave morality to people who had none. Despite the people who laughed at him, I who have laughed loudest, have the utmost respect for him in death. To be able to affect the world like he did, he is indeed a great man. May your legacy be remembered fondly by all whom you have taught the value of conservation. Alauz Out.
Idiots of today, Geniuses of tomorrow
Monday, September 04, 2006
Hiatus
Thought
I've put much thought into these few days. Some call it the hermit syndrome, others call it the anti-social vibe. Well, thinking is not so much a thing you do. But rather something that I LIKE to do in silence and free from interruptions. You rarely get that when your out with people, thus I like to keep myself away just to complete the thought process.
Coherence
What you think about doesn't need to make sense. If everything you thought about made sense, then you wouldn't be a normal human anymore. When we think, randomness in our thoughts reflect heavily on the Chaos of the universe. With Chaos comes balance and all things that mediates us. If your thoughts are devoid of Chaos, then your definitely OUT OF BALANCE. Because if you can no longer decipher Chaos from Balance in your thoughts, then your already lost in the Chaos and have lost the Balance that allows you to see it.
Sense
Does my previous paragraph make sense? If not then you are already lost in thought that is nonsense. To tell the difference of Shadow from the Light means there's Light. To nonsensically claim that you have "banished" the Shadow only means that your now totally dominated by it because the only way for that to happen is the absence of Light. Do not fall down that dark path if you value your soul. While the world has absolutes, we may only become pure Shadow and never pure Light. Why? It's because we're the ones that cast the shadow, when the Light shines upon us.
Not one or the Other
What am I saying? That humans cannot be pure Good? Yes, that's EXACTLY what I'm saying. Only one being in the whole universe that is pure Light, it is God. To maintain the balance that is the universe, he made us half Light, half Shadow. Thus if we try to lose one and become the other, try as we might but we will only become pure Shadow. It's because God's already pure Good. So which one do you want to become? Buddha said that we should all live the "Middle Path". What does that imply? I seriously don't know about you, but I know which path I'm taking.
Contradictions or Clarity
You may think that I'm constantly trying to contradict myself. Your right. Thru contradictions, I balance my arguments against one another. Thru that balance, we find out after two opposing arguments crash, which argument is the strongest OR is there a middle path out of the deadlock. Thus in constantly contradicting yourself, you find out your true nature. You will choose between two difficult decisions and when you make a choice between the two or take a different path, you learn more of your own True Self.
Good, Evil or Lots of Both
Everyone falls into 4 categories
- Quite Good 70-90%
- Middle 50+-%
- Quite Evil 20+%
- Just Plain Evil 20-%
As you can see, there's no Just Plain Good. Not even a Saint is more than 90% good. But people can be 100% evil. So that explains part of the human nature and thru that insight, opens up a tiny fraction of the universe's nature.
Thought Betrays Us
Why we cannot be good? It's because if we reach that extreme, we no longer have anything to judge ourselves. We no longer have a moral compass to show us which way to handle a situation that would warrant 100% goodness. By losing that moral compass, it's like your conscience suddenly fading away because you literally become your conscience. And in becoming the very thing that made you good, you will fall into darkness because all inhibitions restricted upon you will cease to exist.
Breaking of the Mold
Thus you can do ANYTHING and there'd be nothing holding you back. I mean it, people who claimed to have conquered themselves end up becoming tyrants. The Alpha Figure is one good example. He or she is the shining example of what all their brethren aspire to become. Thus this Alpha figure can implement ANYTHING I mean anything, and all their brethren will comply. In a more "human" example I shall go into fanatical leaders. They are the perfect example of people who claimed to have conquered themselves.
Terrorism is Enlightenment
Yes, the leaders of all the terrorism around in the world are our conquerors of themselves. They have finally broken down that final barrier and became power incarnate. Your greatest enemy is Yourself. And if you conquer that, you become the very essence of power. Your charisma, confidence and ability will be unopposed by all. And when you go unopposed in your actions, you take revenge on all those who has wronged you or the people you love. You become an Angel of Wrath literally.
Enlightenment with a limit
So for all those who have been reading my blog. I've always asked you to become more enlightened. Here's the counter argument that is long overdue. And that's why I know that I am a nasty person who keep telling others to become what I dare not. I'm going to hell for this cowardice, but I ain't doing it without a clear conscience. Ironic? Haha, then you obviously don't understand the machinations of how balance works.
Scales of Balance
Let me say something before I end today's Brainwashing Session. If you commit a Wrong, you can commit a million Rights and that Wrong will never be repaid. Thus after I expose you to Evils of Enlightenment, it's a Wrong. Warning you about the consequences of becoming Enlightened, is a Right. But the Scales of Balance doesn't work that way. My warning doesn't nullify the wrong I've done. Let's make a more rational example.
From Terrorism to Charity
"IF the Al'Queda decided to STOP all terrorist activity and started to use it's resources to rebuilt and support all the lives affected by their terrorism for the next 50 years." Will it nullify the fact that they did all those acts of terrorism? That's what I'm talking about, your sins ARE NOT LESSENED by the good deeds that you do. So PLEASE, please don't think you can buy your way back into heaven. We're all going down for the sins we've done. Hehehe, see you there. Alauz Out.
Idiots of today, Geniuses of tomorrow
Thought
I've put much thought into these few days. Some call it the hermit syndrome, others call it the anti-social vibe. Well, thinking is not so much a thing you do. But rather something that I LIKE to do in silence and free from interruptions. You rarely get that when your out with people, thus I like to keep myself away just to complete the thought process.
Coherence
What you think about doesn't need to make sense. If everything you thought about made sense, then you wouldn't be a normal human anymore. When we think, randomness in our thoughts reflect heavily on the Chaos of the universe. With Chaos comes balance and all things that mediates us. If your thoughts are devoid of Chaos, then your definitely OUT OF BALANCE. Because if you can no longer decipher Chaos from Balance in your thoughts, then your already lost in the Chaos and have lost the Balance that allows you to see it.
Sense
Does my previous paragraph make sense? If not then you are already lost in thought that is nonsense. To tell the difference of Shadow from the Light means there's Light. To nonsensically claim that you have "banished" the Shadow only means that your now totally dominated by it because the only way for that to happen is the absence of Light. Do not fall down that dark path if you value your soul. While the world has absolutes, we may only become pure Shadow and never pure Light. Why? It's because we're the ones that cast the shadow, when the Light shines upon us.
Not one or the Other
What am I saying? That humans cannot be pure Good? Yes, that's EXACTLY what I'm saying. Only one being in the whole universe that is pure Light, it is God. To maintain the balance that is the universe, he made us half Light, half Shadow. Thus if we try to lose one and become the other, try as we might but we will only become pure Shadow. It's because God's already pure Good. So which one do you want to become? Buddha said that we should all live the "Middle Path". What does that imply? I seriously don't know about you, but I know which path I'm taking.
Contradictions or Clarity
You may think that I'm constantly trying to contradict myself. Your right. Thru contradictions, I balance my arguments against one another. Thru that balance, we find out after two opposing arguments crash, which argument is the strongest OR is there a middle path out of the deadlock. Thus in constantly contradicting yourself, you find out your true nature. You will choose between two difficult decisions and when you make a choice between the two or take a different path, you learn more of your own True Self.
Good, Evil or Lots of Both
Everyone falls into 4 categories
- Quite Good 70-90%
- Middle 50+-%
- Quite Evil 20+%
- Just Plain Evil 20-%
As you can see, there's no Just Plain Good. Not even a Saint is more than 90% good. But people can be 100% evil. So that explains part of the human nature and thru that insight, opens up a tiny fraction of the universe's nature.
Thought Betrays Us
Why we cannot be good? It's because if we reach that extreme, we no longer have anything to judge ourselves. We no longer have a moral compass to show us which way to handle a situation that would warrant 100% goodness. By losing that moral compass, it's like your conscience suddenly fading away because you literally become your conscience. And in becoming the very thing that made you good, you will fall into darkness because all inhibitions restricted upon you will cease to exist.
Breaking of the Mold
Thus you can do ANYTHING and there'd be nothing holding you back. I mean it, people who claimed to have conquered themselves end up becoming tyrants. The Alpha Figure is one good example. He or she is the shining example of what all their brethren aspire to become. Thus this Alpha figure can implement ANYTHING I mean anything, and all their brethren will comply. In a more "human" example I shall go into fanatical leaders. They are the perfect example of people who claimed to have conquered themselves.
Terrorism is Enlightenment
Yes, the leaders of all the terrorism around in the world are our conquerors of themselves. They have finally broken down that final barrier and became power incarnate. Your greatest enemy is Yourself. And if you conquer that, you become the very essence of power. Your charisma, confidence and ability will be unopposed by all. And when you go unopposed in your actions, you take revenge on all those who has wronged you or the people you love. You become an Angel of Wrath literally.
Enlightenment with a limit
So for all those who have been reading my blog. I've always asked you to become more enlightened. Here's the counter argument that is long overdue. And that's why I know that I am a nasty person who keep telling others to become what I dare not. I'm going to hell for this cowardice, but I ain't doing it without a clear conscience. Ironic? Haha, then you obviously don't understand the machinations of how balance works.
Scales of Balance
Let me say something before I end today's Brainwashing Session. If you commit a Wrong, you can commit a million Rights and that Wrong will never be repaid. Thus after I expose you to Evils of Enlightenment, it's a Wrong. Warning you about the consequences of becoming Enlightened, is a Right. But the Scales of Balance doesn't work that way. My warning doesn't nullify the wrong I've done. Let's make a more rational example.
From Terrorism to Charity
"IF the Al'Queda decided to STOP all terrorist activity and started to use it's resources to rebuilt and support all the lives affected by their terrorism for the next 50 years." Will it nullify the fact that they did all those acts of terrorism? That's what I'm talking about, your sins ARE NOT LESSENED by the good deeds that you do. So PLEASE, please don't think you can buy your way back into heaven. We're all going down for the sins we've done. Hehehe, see you there. Alauz Out.
Idiots of today, Geniuses of tomorrow
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